What is your topic?
My topic is about death penalty in Japan.
What is your thesis (roughly stated) and what are the main points that support it?
my thesis:
The death penalty in Japan has to be thought critically whether to be abolished or not by Japanese people because it raises some ethical problems.
main points which support my thesis:
Death penalty makes conflicts between human rights and political power for society.
It is difficult to find the difference between killing by person and by the nation.
Japanese death penalty is secrecy and Japanese people don't know about death penalty enough.
The revenge for criminal is not the reasonable way.
Why did you choose your topic?
I have thought we Japanese have to think deeply that death penalty is right or wrong as people in Japan which has death penalty contrary to world trend.
自己紹介
- Naoki
- Shiono Naoki Man 22 Favorite: cycling, video game 2013年IT会社就職 2013年8月に退社 刺激的な働き方、楽しい働き方を日々模索中。 2013年8月末から、アジアに旅立ちました。 バックパックひとつ背負いながら、 就職活動中。
Hi Naoki,
返信削除This is Chris Hoskins, your ARW teacher. I rewrote your thesis so that it includes your reasons. You have four reasons. I suggest cutting one because three is enough for a five paragraph essay, and the third reason may be difficult to use as a reason for your argument. Reasons 1, 2, and 4 are the strongest.
Please use this rewritten version of your thesis if you want to.
Japanese people should serious consider whether or not to abolish the death penalty because it raises some ethical problems, including a conflict between human rights and political power in society, difficult in finding the difference between killing by a person and by the nation, ignorance within the general population about the death penalty, and the fact that revenge against criminals is not reasonable.
Thanks!